Lorraine shares her experience returning home to Panama
At the beginning of last semester, I was homesick most of the time. Every time I noticed something different from what I expected in the U.S. like the high costs of food, the cultural differences, etc. I would think:
“If I were home, this wouldn’t be this way.”
“This would be easier if I were home.”
But at the same time, I was scared that nothing would be the same when I got back. I worried about losing friends because I couldn’t see them as often, about family members forgetting how things used to be when I was there, about my dog forgetting me or about simply not feeling at home in my own home.
Still, despite everything, I missed home. Even if I feared that, when I returned, nothing would be the same.
Finally, Dec. 14 arrived, and I was able to go home. As soon as I landed at Tocumen International Airport in Panama City, my best friends and my parents greeted me at the airport. I walked outside, felt the hottest weather ever, hugged my family and friends and suddenly, everything was exactly as I had left it. Well, not exactly, maybe even better. After the airport, I had dinner with my friends and family. It was the best meal of my life. We caught up after months of being apart. When I got home, I saw my dog. She was the happiest and, without a doubt, recognized me.
In the end, going home wasn’t different in the way I had feared. Even though I had been away for five months, it still felt like home. I got to spend time with almost all my friends, enjoy the daily 90-degree heat I used to complain about, sleep in my own bed, have my clothes, my dog, my mom, my dad—my family. It was amazing.
The only real change was me. I’m almost a real adult now. I’ve always been independent, but living on my own made me truly responsible for everything. I used to want to figure things out by myself, without my parents explaining them to me. But when I was home, even after spending months literally living 3,000 miles away, I just wanted to go everywhere with my mom and my dad.
Eventually, I returned. I still miss home but I feel better knowing that no matter how far I go home will always be home.
