NOTE: This story is a joke created to celebrate April Fools’ Day. All individuals mentioned in the story have given their consent to participate.
According to local Crete Police, Thomas the Tiger, Doane’s beloved and fierce mascot, has been reported missing. Thomas the Tiger was last seen by Senior Isaac Ebke on Sunday, March 30, alone in a Lincoln Scooters. Students saw a post of Thomas attending wellness events earlier in the week, but it is not confirmed yet if those wellness initiatives were a result of the stress Thomas was feeling before he went missing.
“I think this reflects a greater issue revolving around men’s mental health. Thomas should’ve felt safe and supported on campus…,” sophomore Laura Ruiz said. “It’s just so sad.”
Doane Security is working with different universities to investigate Thomas’s last whereabouts and an unresolved conflict between Thomas, Concordia’s mascot Bruiser, and Herbie the Husker. It is still unofficial if there was a possible relationship between Thomas and Bruiser, but at the Doane-Concordia game, one student alleged seeing Thomas playfully flirting with Bruiser.
This may surprise students, as Thomas was previously reported to be “going steady” with Herbie the Husker. This hints that there may have been an unknown love triangle between the mascots.
Owl reporters reached out to Bruiser, and though he had no additional comments about these allegations, or if he had anything to do with Thomas going missing. He stated, “I’ve complied with all police investigations and wish Thomas returns home safe.”
Leaked texts between Herbie the Husker indicate that Thomas had broken up with him, but Herbie still had feelings and felt betrayed to hear that Thomas was able to rebound so quickly. “It was just so sudden, and now hearing about him and Bruiser… I feel like I never really knew the real Thomas. He hurt me, but I’d never hurt him. I just want him to come home,” Herbie said.
One possible lead to Thomas’s whereabouts comes from a note found in the Gaylord Basement, a place Thomas was known to go to relax. The note read: “I’m deeply ashamed of my relationship with Bruiser. I’ve betrayed the school, and I’ve betrayed Nebraska.” It is unclear if the note is in Thomas’s handwriting or if other paws may have written it.
Security reports that foul play may be at hand in Thomas’s case, but they are working hard to ensure his safety and hope to find him soon. The first forty-eight hours of a missing persons case are the most important.
If you have any related information on Thomas the Tiger’s whereabouts or any possible sightings, please contact Student Affairs or Doane Security with any findings. Doane is offering unlimited Doane Dollars to students who can bring back our beloved mascot.
