Hair is such an important part of many people’s lives, especially Black women’s. Over the years, many styles have come in—dreads, perms, wigs and sew-ins. I had a perm in middle school, but I don’t think I fully understood what it meant at the time. I just thought it would make my hair less annoying to deal with in the mornings.
Like many other black women during COVID-19, I decided to do the big chop and start fresh. After cutting my hair, I forgot the annoyance of combing it in the morning and the pain of detangling. So, I started using braids as an alternative. They’re easy to take care of and can last about two months, depending on how well you maintain them.
Now, my two months are up. Here I am in college, without a car, unable to drive to get my hair done. I have no experience with my natural hair and it’s time to unbraid it and figure out how to maintain it.
I once came across a woman on TikTok who was having a meltdown because she didn’t know how to do her own hair. It’s easy to judge and ask, “You’re a grown woman, how can you not know how to comb your own hair?” But it’s a real challenge, and I can definitely relate. Your arms get tired, it’s hard to see the back of your head and no matter how tightly you hold it down, it still comes up on its own.
I’ve spent this entire week watching YouTube videos of black women with long, thick hair, styling it with ease. I want to learn to love my hair as much as they do. I want my hair to grow, flourish.
Honestly, I’m scared. I’ve ordered a few products I’ve never used before—gels, mousse, and sprays—and I’m praying for some divine intervention. I really wish I had learned this sooner, but I have to remind myself that there’s no shame in when or where you start.
I’m learning to love my 4c hair, with all the struggles that come with it. I’m choosing not to see it as a burden, but as a privilege to work with my tight, coiled hair. It defies gravity and shrinks when wet. It shines in the light and gets fluffy in an afro. It’s my crown, and I’ll wear it proudly on my head.
